How should Christians pray?

Question 11000

Prayer is one of the most fundamental aspects of the Christian life, yet many believers struggle with it. We know we should pray, but how exactly should we go about it? Is there a right way and a wrong way? What did Jesus teach His disciples when they asked Him this very question?

The Example Jesus Gave Us

When the disciples asked Jesus to teach them to pray, He gave them what we call the Lord’s Prayer. Now, this was never meant to be a prayer to recite mindlessly but rather a pattern to follow. Let’s look at it in Matthew 6:9-13:

“Pray then like this: ‘Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.'” Matthew 6:9-13

Notice how Jesus structures this prayer. It begins with worship and recognition of who God is. “Our Father” tells us we are approaching someone who knows us intimately and loves us. “In heaven” reminds us of His transcendence and majesty. “Hallowed be your name” is pure worship, acknowledging His holiness before we ask for anything.

Then comes submission to God’s purposes: “Your kingdom come, your will be done.” Before we bring our shopping list to God, we align ourselves with His agenda. This is not always easy, especially when our will conflicts with His, but it is essential. Prayer is not about bending God to our will but about conforming our will to His.

Only after worship and submission do we come to personal requests. “Give us this day our daily bread” covers our physical needs. “Forgive us our debts” addresses our spiritual needs. “Lead us not into temptation” concerns our protection from the enemy. Notice how brief these requests are compared to the opening. Many of us have this backwards, spending most of our prayer time on requests and very little on worship.

Pray in Jesus’ Name

Jesus said, “Whatever you ask in my name, this I will do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son.” John 14:13. What does it mean to pray in Jesus’ name? It does not mean tacking “in Jesus’ name, Amen” onto the end of every prayer like a magic formula. To pray in someone’s name means to pray according to their character, their will, their authority. When we pray in Jesus’ name, we are praying as His representatives, asking for things that align with His purposes.

This is why 1 John 5:14-15 says, “And this is the confidence that we have toward him, that if we ask anything according to his will he hears us. And if we know that he hears us in whatever we ask, we know that we have the requests that we have asked of him.” The key phrase is “according to his will.” Prayer is not a blank cheque. It is a conversation with our Father where we learn to want what He wants.

Pray with Persistence

Jesus told a parable about a persistent widow who kept coming to an unjust judge until he gave her justice (Luke 18:1-8). The point was “that they ought always to pray and not lose heart.” God is not an unjust judge who needs to be pestered, but Jesus is teaching us that persistence in prayer is good. We should not give up after one attempt.

Think of Daniel who prayed for twenty-one days before receiving an answer. The angel told him, “From the first day that you set your heart to understand and humbled yourself before your God, your words have been heard, and I have come because of your words.” Daniel 10:12. His prayer was heard on day one, but the answer took three weeks to arrive. What if Daniel had given up on day twenty?

Pray with Faith

James tells us, “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind.” James 1:5-6. Faith does not mean certainty that we will get exactly what we asked for. Faith means confidence that God hears us, that He is good, and that He will answer in the way that is best.

Sometimes we do not receive because we do not ask (James 4:2). Other times we ask and do not receive because we ask wrongly, to spend it on our passions (James 4:3). But when we ask according to God’s will, in faith, with persistence, we can be confident that God is at work even when we cannot see the results immediately.

Pray in the Spirit

Paul tells us to be “praying at all times in the Spirit, with all prayer and supplication” (Ephesians 6:18). The Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness, for “we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words” (Romans 8:26). What a comfort this is. Even when we do not know how to pray, the Spirit prays through us and for us.

Praying in the Spirit means being sensitive to His leading. Sometimes He will prompt us to pray for someone or something we had not considered. Sometimes He will burden our hearts with intercession. Learn to follow His leading rather than simply going through a mental checklist.

Practical Considerations

Should we kneel? Close our eyes? Fold our hands? The Bible shows people praying in all sorts of postures: standing, kneeling, lying prostrate, with hands raised, with eyes open, with eyes closed. The posture is far less important than the heart. That said, our physical posture can help our spiritual focus. Kneeling reminds us of our humble position before God. Closing our eyes helps eliminate distractions. But these are helps, not requirements.

When should we pray? Paul says to “pray without ceasing” (1 Thessalonians 5:17). This does not mean we should never stop vocalising prayers but that our hearts should be in constant communion with God throughout the day. Set times of focused prayer are valuable, but so are the quick prayers throughout the day: “Lord, help me in this meeting,” “Father, give me wisdom with this decision,” “Thank you for that unexpected kindness.”

Should we pray alone or with others? Both. Jesus withdrew to lonely places to pray (Luke 5:16), but He also prayed with His disciples. The early church devoted themselves to prayer together (Acts 2:42). Private prayer builds our personal relationship with God. Corporate prayer builds unity in the body and reminds us that we are part of something bigger than ourselves.

Conclusion

Prayer is simply talking with God. It is worship, confession, thanksgiving, and supplication. It is aligning our hearts with His purposes. It is bringing our needs to a Father who cares. Do not overcomplicate it. The Pharisees made prayer into a performance; Jesus calls us to honest, humble conversation with our heavenly Father. Start where you are. Pray as you can, not as you cannot. As you practice, you will grow. And remember: God is more eager to hear from you than you are to speak to Him.

“And when you pray, you must not be like the hypocrites. For they love to stand and pray in the synagogues and at the street corners, that they may be seen by others. Truly, I say to you, they have received their reward. But when you pray, go into your room and shut the door and pray to your Father who is in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you.” Matthew 6:5-6